This is the start of part two....

I know I told everyone out there, nope I am done, finished, caput....well I was and now I am not.

Isn't it a women's perogative to change her mind? Well I have, my life is nothing like it used to be or will be again. I have gone through so many changes: personal, physical, mental and what I was missing was the outlet to write this down. I have a personal home journal, but my wrist is killing me (ortho appt on my horizon) so I haven't even been doing that.

I don't know where to begin, so we shall just take it from here. I have ended yet another relationship. This time I am devastated as I thought maybe he was the one! What do I say or think....I have no words that can possibly explain how I am feeling right now. I am blessed with great friends who out of the blue (and not so blue) have rescued me from myself this weekend. Without them, I might have been a goner!! No, seriously I am a mess, I feel like I am moving but out of my body, I can't understand this whole deal. I think the worst is he is taking all the blame, but won't talk about it, I can't heal unless I know what happened, but I will heal and move on and so forth!

So we will back up a bit and catch you all up on me: I have spent the better part of Thanksgiving through the end of Jan 2010 sick! I didn't think I was ever going to come out the medicine induced haze that was my life for those months. Christmas was eh....got a great gift, but then again, he is gone now so....New Years Eve, well he made a wonderful dinner for me, we watched movies and the ball drop at midnight...talking about our future. Valentine's Day, well I was rescued by yet another friend who took me out to visit our friends and not let me dwell on what was not going to happen yet again!

My oldest son has officially moved out! He is growing up and becoming such a great young man, and I am so proud of him. My youngest, is happy at school, playing his guitar and enjoying his life. Me, well you can read above! lol I am disappointed to say the least at this turn of events, but I will survive. I am just going to concentrate on me for a bit again!

I have some new pics to put up, but no time right now...I like that I can blog at work again :)

I miss all of my friends out there who have been there for me, and all the ups and downs called my life!