I did it again.............

I started out this new blog with all intentions of being a good blogger, and where am I?  AWOL - that would be the best description at this point!  geez.  Ok, a little recap, been having a great time...ok A wonderful time!! lol  I have had a few dates (and I am not going further into that right now), I have had a great time reconnecting with old friends and at the same time meeting new ones!  I have just been being me and having fun!  Our softball uniforms are in, first game, t-minus three weeks!!  eek...I have been diligently going to batting practice (thank god) and well the rest will just happen!  lol  We have been doing weekly gatherings and hanging out...lots of pool, conversation and good times!!

Spring has finally arrived in the NE, thank god because after this past winter I was done!  Well over it, we had over 100" of snow, which I will say is unprecendented for us.  The bulk of the 77+ came in February.  Seriously, I thought we would see snow till July, but some miraculous thing occurred and it became sunny and warm and melted all that nasty stuff away!  More than ever I have come to realize that I am not a winter girl anymore :(  Where did she go, that girl who loved to skate and ski?? Well she had quite a few knee surgeries and just can't do it anymore...boo hoo

What else, geez....I believe I mentioned the older one moved out.  Now I am cleaning out the house, want to sell and downsize.  I seriously need to.  I am even thinking about relocating, I know this topic has come up before also, and while it's not always in the forefront of my mind, it's still there.  Somewhere a little more south, I have been checking out our work job postings to see if anything of any interest to me pops up!  I hate to leave my family and friends here, but I think my life has come to a point where change is inevitable at this time....maybe not, but I am keeping my options open for now.

Weight - well I will skim on this...almost the same...I think I have gained about 5 lbs....I am hoping softball and my refined eating habits once again will alleve me of these extra pounds....do any of my WLS friends fret when you gain?  I do, it's horrible....

Easter weekend is almost upon us, we are beach bound, with the weatherman calling for almost 80's this weekend and well there are 30 bands playing for free, I know my son has said on one or two occasions in the past week he would love to see them!  Since it's a parking lot atmosphere he will be able to because the rest of the year they will be holed up in the bar!!  lol  So I believe we are beachbound, suntan lotion in hand...and I am looking forward to a great long weekend!!

The results are in............

and the answer is, I have to get the whole procedure done again in three months.  They weren't able to run it 100% positive, but it was not negative either :(  This really upsets the whole coming up months.  Around the birthday is when I go back and start again.  This is really not how I planned on starting my summer. 

On a brighter note, I have joined the softball team of a bunch of old jr high friends.  We have our first game April 23rd..yeah.  I have gotten back into my yoga routine after the long illness.  Already I can say I feel alot better about myself.  I have had not quite a great past few weeks, although being ill doesn't qualify as feeling good, I felt really good about myself when I was with him.  Although that is over, and I really need to let it go, I am having a harder time than before.  The others I could qualify in my head what went wrong and how wrong they were for me, this time it's different and I can't do it, it seems.

Tomorrow is hopefully a rain event, I am so sick of the snow and all the winter and cold we have had this year.  I hoping our spring is mild and sunny, although rainy and cooler seems to be the norm.  lol

I am going to finish watching The Time Traveler's Wife now, enjoy the evening.

I should be...............

getting ready for this work event....but I am not.  I am procrastinating to the nth degree.  I am not pleased, nor unpleased with my job and that is the problem.  I love what I do, have always loved my position within my company until late last year.  Things changed dramatically.....Why should you ask, well there were issues, underemployment, not enough time in a 24 hr day to get things done...so they brought in a new boss.  Yes....

I don't even want to talk about how degrading and everything else that felt.  So here I am....plugging along at a job I LOVED to say it's ok.

I think there are brighter horizons on my future!  Maybe not here, but somewhere.

Ok, another note, I am disallusioned about breakups.  That to me means clean cut, done, no talk, no more....


Ok, Maybe you have another perception of this....I don't.  Strict, stringent, pigheaded...I don't know..but I am so sore when he calls.  Which is quite frequent now, gleeful, happy like when we dated....WTF happened....seriously, I don't get it.  The latest, tonight, he calls, I am on my way out for three days, TX and NM be home late Sat afternoon.  Ok, give me a pause but doesn't that sound like a conversation with two people who are dating??? I am confused, disallusioned and yes Pissed at the whole scenario....

So with that I do need to get ready to go to the production tonight called work....Absolut Berri Acai, for those whole like vodka it's the newest thing...for me...eh

Maybe I will blog when I get home from the festivities...maybe not...

A busy day....

Tonight is a very busy night for us at work, kickoff time.  We will be introducing yet another flavor of vodka to the vast battalion that is already out there!  Needless to say I am not a vodka drinker, which is very good for me!

Last night was a muriad of chores...changing beds, fixing up the spare bedroom into my craft/tv room, dinner, dishes and just the regular things I get into every night.  Needless to say I found a little time to blog and still get everything else done.  When I finally fell into bed (exhausted) I am finding that I am working myself to the limit of exhaustion everynight so that I do not dwell on the recent breakup :(  I had nightmares for the second night in a row.  Waking up to a feeling that a person is in my room, people without faces or means but just blurring by me.  Not sure what it all means, but in honesty I am person who remembers dreams.  This new thing surely has me wondering on what level of subconscious this is all coming from.  I have a feeling it's the fact that I am not happy with the current circumstances of my life, or the fact that the last breakup ended so badly.  Maybe it's the emotional connection I was able to make with him, that is now gone, so therefore my comfort level being alone is diminished right now.  Who knows!!  But tonight, hopefully I will have a full night of sleep without awaking or remembering my dreams.

Work is neverending busy, winter is hopefully going to fizzle out soon.  I can't say that in my whole life I can recall a snowier winter than we have had this winter.  The weather people said we have officially had the snowiest few storms, the last two on the record books, but our first measurable snow right before Christmas was about 18".  I am counting down the days until we spring forward for daylight savings time and then spring!!   I know I will complain later, but right now if it rained till June I would be happy.  At least this storm we are experiencing now is in the form of rain, but then they are calling for another wintry blast this weekend :(  More snow...UGH!!!